Mother’s Day extra eventful on the diamond for Hampshire Regional softball super-mom Becky Dubay

WESTHAMPTON — Becky Dubay could never pack lunches for her four daughters without hearing some sort of complaint. Whether it was her oldest daughter, Josie, her twins, Raegan and Ryanne, or her youngest, Kalin, each of them would always let their mom know if something about their lunch wasn’t right before she shipped them off to elementary school.

Until one day, when Becky had enough. The quartet of youngsters entered the kitchen to find Becky hadn’t packed lunch for any of them; they were on their own. Knowing the fallout would be a comical moment to look back on, she pulled out her phone and began recording.

The video is about seven minutes long according to Becky, and throughout the entirety of it all four girls entered scramble mode – they had to find food to bring to school. The twins, who are now both sophomores at Hampshire Regional, were around 6 years old at the time. Kalin, now a freshman at Hampshire, was four, and Josie, who just finished up her first year of college, 10.

As Becky recalls, Ryanne put a couple of raw eggs in her lunchbox, because she knew eggs are a healthy food but didn’t understand she had to cook them first. Raegan tossed an entire bag of pepperoni into her lunchbox, Kalin shoved as many packages of fruit snacks into hers as she could muster, and Josie made a bagel with way too much jelly smeared on it. When Becky panned the camera to Josie, it was quite easy to tell how awful the bagel tasted given her reaction after taking a test bite.

Mom had made her point.

“When that was all over, I asked them, ‘Do you guys think it’s easy to juggle all of the things life has to offer and then have to make all of your lunches?’” Becky recalled. “And from that day forward, even though they were so young, they always made their lunches and they still do to this day. They put everything together, and what they don’t pack is on them. I supply the food, they put it together and pack it. And they help each other out, you know, make sure they have enough water or snacks, and they’ll bring extra snacks for their friends. They do a great job of staying on top of everything.”

Despite the occasional headache, Becky says those days were her favorite, and that she’d do anything to go back to them.

“It was total chaos. It was nuts to say the least, but it was the best time,” Becky said. “We had three dogs, my grandfather who was over 80 [years old] lived with us, and of course, the four kids. And I always one thousand percent loved every minute of it.”

While she may not have to tend to her daughters as much now as she had to when they were under 10, Becky’s still busy buzzing around in other ways. With Josie back from art school in Maine and moved in – which Kalin may have to re-adjust to since she’ll have to go back to sharing a room with her oldest sister – and the high school softball season in full swing, her schedule is as jam-packed as ever.

Raegan, Ryanne and Kalin are stars on the Hampshire softball team. Ryanne is a phenomenal pitcher and throws to Raegan, who is the team’s catcher. Kalin is the second baseman and is as sure-handed as they come. All three hit toward the top of Hampshire’s batting order and are irreplaceable pieces on Hampshire’s 14-1 team that currently sits No. 1 in the most recent MIAA Division 4 Power Rankings.

It’s not always easy for Becky to get to the Raiders’ games. Although she never misses any, she’s often deprived of sleep when she arrives – and needs lots of coffee to make it through a seven-inning affair. Becky works an overnight shift at Cooley Dickinson Hospital in Northampton where she goes in around 9 p.m. and gets home at 8 a.m. She works seven days straight then has a week off, and repeats that schedule throughout the year. Even if she has work that night, she drives the girls to and from practice and attends each game – alongside her beautiful, mild-mannered dog, Duke – regardless of how far the trek is. Rest certainly isn’t a primary focus, and on some days, it may not even be a secondary one.

Mother’s Day on Sunday marks an opportunity for Becky to be recognized, loved and appreciated for the laundry list of sacrifices she’s had to make for her four daughters. Though in her eyes, every day feels like Mother’s Day, because her girls constantly remind her how important she is to them.

“I am the luckiest person ever,” Becky said. “I seriously have the best four kids ever. I love them. I love how they’re all so different. They know how hard it is. They always make me feel appreciated. They pick up on the cooking, they pick up on the cleaning, help me around the house and always ask if I need something. I’m so thankful to have them in my life.”

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Last spring, Becky had it even harder. Josie attended Smith Vocational and played on the Vikings’ softball team as a catcher. Both Hampshire and Smith Voc played on the same day several times, and it was impossible for Becky to be two places at once. Luckily, the Raiders live-streamed all of their home games, so she could watch Ryanne, Raegan and Kalin on her phone while sitting at Smith Voc games for Josie.

During one game last season, the Vikings were losing by double digits, and Josie wasn’t having a good game. She glanced over at Becky hoping her mom would cheer her up. Instead, Becky was smiling and pumping her fist as she looked up from her phone. The first thought that came to Josie’s mind?

“‘Why are you laughing and having so much fun over there?’” Josie said with a chuckle.

Then she realized.

“But then it clicked,” Josie continued. “I remembered that my sisters also had a game that day, so I figured either one of them hit a home run or got on base, or Ryanne struck somebody out in a big moment. So yeah, I was a little mad that she was smiling until I realized it was probably because one of my sisters did something good.”

Among all of the life lessons and tough love, there have been countless moments where Becky has enjoyed goofing off with her girls – which happens a lot nowadays. All five Dubays have bright, wide smiles that almost never leave their faces when around one another. They may be related, but it feels like they’re a group of best friends.

A handful of years back, Josie, Raegan, Ryanne and Kalin loved to build forts – what kid didn’t? Becky stormed into the family room one day to see almost every blanket in the house had been layered on top of one another. Inside the fort were the four girls, all painting their nails. All mom could do was laugh, and, join in, of course.

“We loved to build forts; all of us,” Josie said. “Mom would come in and be like, ‘Oh my gosh, what are you doing?’ And we’d be pulling blankets in all different directions. Eventually she’d just get in the fort with us and we’d all be painting each other’s nails. But it was a fun game for us, just seeing how many blankets we could use before mom finds out.”

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Becky Dubay never played softball, or really any sports, for that matter. She jokes that she saved the softball skills for her daughters, all of whom are extremely talented players. Sure, Becky may not have taught her girls how to play, but she’s done – and still does – what any good parent would do to help them live out their passion.

“Driving them to practice, driving them to games, driving them to summer league games all over the state, that’s what parents do – they sacrifice for their kids,” Hampshire softball head coach Brian McGan said. “Becky has stepped up big time this year. She’s helped so much with senior day stuff, and she’s provided her time to help us out in a number of ways. And her time is extremely valuable, because she works overnights and has to sleep during the day. So anything she does for this program is a huge help.”

Another immensely important reason as to why the Hampshire softball program is as dominant as it is has a lot to do with the Raiders’ youth clinics – which Becky helped create and organize when her kids were coming up the ranks for Southampton 12U softball.

“She started the ‘Raiders Camp’ with the little kids, where my team will come and do a camp with the youth players in the area,” McGan said. “It’s helped the young kids tremendously and it’s helped my team bond and connect. I know Becky has had a lot to do with that, and she’s done a bunch of fundraising and stuff that makes a big difference for us.”

And for McGan, Becky raised three girls that play integral parts on his team. Kalin leads Hampshire in hits, Raegan leads the team in doubles and plays one of the hardest positions (catcher) in all of sports, and Ryanne is the ace, mowing down opponents in the pitching circle.

“They’re three out of the nine, so what’s that percentage?” McGan said with a laugh. “You lose those three, and it gets a little bit difficult. The two twins, they came up as an eighth grade class and went to a state final and were big parts of it. KK (Kalin) came up after them, and she’s been a huge part of this year. She started out as a [pinch] runner, but last year she progressed as a hitter, then this year she’s taken off. They all have come up in big moments for us.”

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Sunday should be a fun one for the Dubays. Hampshire hosts Minnechaug on Sunday afternoon, a makeup game changed from Friday to avoid the weather. Is there a more fitting place for the Dubay family to spend Mother’s Day than a softball diamond? Perhaps not.

Becky has always been and always will do anything for her daughters, and once the game is over, Josie, Raegan, Ryanne and Kalin are going to return the favor.

“I’m just so proud of mom for everything she’s been able to accomplish,” Josie said. “Any time I have a rough day, or something didn’t go how I had hoped, I just picture her smile on my mind and think about the advice she would give me. She’s the person who got me where I am today, and I know my siblings would say the same thing.”