Woman worried about lack of sex with new partner given advice

Don't patronize your partner at the expense of your own needs. This is the advice American psychotherapist Pamela Stevenson Connolly gave to a woman worried about the lack of sex in her relationship, The Guardian writes.

The reader who wrote to Connolly said she had met a man she matched on all counts. The only downside to their relationship, she said, was the complete lack of sex. "He has anxiety and takes medication that reduces his libido. He also takes blood thinners, which erection pills don't mix with," she wrote.

The woman added that her new lover was showing sexual interest, but there was no passion in his kissing or touching. “I’ve never had this problem before, so while I understand his vulnerability, I don’t know what to do other than wait,” she wrote.

Connolly agreed that the best thing to do in such a situation is to be patient and allow the person to come to the desire for intimacy on their own. She added that while being supportive and understanding, it is important to make sure that the woman does not put her partner’s needs ahead of her own. “If there are elements of compulsivity in the manifestations of care, it is better to distance yourself a little. Because people who give too much eventually burn out and feel undervalued,” the psychotherapist explained.

She added that over-caring is also harmful to the partner, as it pushes them towards learned helplessness.

Earlier, sex coach Laura Collins gave advice to a married woman who was hooked on phone sex. The expert pointed out that intimacy of this kind is cheating, even without physical contact.